Crocodile Tears
I don’t know why, and I think it’s a little bit sick, but this picture makes me insanely happy.
Look at the little muffin!
Those nice uniformed officers in the front seat must have just told her that they ran out of dick at the corner store.
Either that, or they told Paris that one of the stipulations of her probation is that she has to learn a new word every single day, even if it’s only one syllable.
Her reaction?
Violent, uncontrollable sadness.
Paris: “ONE WORD A DAY?!?!?! I can’t even handle one word a month! How am I supposed to put penises in my mouth if I have to practice learning a word a day!”
It’s ok, kitten. Everything will be alright. Here’s one of those novelty lollipops shaped like a dick that you give women at bachelorette parties. Just put this in your mouth and shut the hell up.
Paris: (Happy as a clam, now that she has candy AND a penis) “OK!”
What a sham this whole thing is. And I love how Paris Hilton’s dumb, worthless ass is generating more media coverage at this point than the Iraq War, the G-8 Summit, and my amazing biceps combined.
Seriously, when did this dildophile become important enough to get coverage on CNN and C-Span?
God help us.
why do i think she so hot???
You think she’s so hot because you like your women like you like your Macaroni and Cheese…easy.